Ah goals…you’re supposed to have those, right? My ex-husband told me that I didn’t have enough ambition for him and that I just “drift through life”. Which was a bit shit to be honest. Sure, I don’t want to climb the corporate ladder or live in a mansion or drive a Ferrari, but I do have ambitions. Having survived a life-threatening illness, I felt for a long time that just being alive and staying that way was ambition enough for anyone, and if I achieved anything else, all well and good.
But he was probably right in a way (damn him!). I don’t exactly strive for greatness. I always just wanted to be a good person, rather than a great one. Money was never a big motivator for me (although, now I have a mortgage looming, I might change that way of thinking!) and I never really cared if I had a high-powered job or was well known in my industry (or any industry!). I just wanted to do ok and get by and not hurt anyone along the way. I wanted to be content and happy with my lot. And have people that love me. That’s pretty much it. And, for the most part, I have achieved that.
So, in the spirit of this blogging challenge, here are some current goals I have tucked away. Some of them are bigger than others. Some are teeny-tiny. But, goals they are. So there. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, doubters!
My Five Current Goals
- Reach settlement on my house, move in to it and out of my rental without having a nervous breakdown or killing someone.
- Lose some weight. Again. Sigh.
- Sort my mental issues out. This year has been hard and I am not ashamed (well, maybe a little ashamed) to admit I have not been coping. Very dark thoughts have been hovering and I have found myself spiralling quite messily into pits of anxiety-based despair and panic. No one to blame but myself. And my brain chemistry. And I was never very good at chemistry, so I need to sort something else out. Find ways to be better at life and being human. I’m sure there’s a manual for it somewhere, right?
- Figure out what I want to do and get a new job that reflects that. ‘Tis hard though…
- Learn to be tidy. I have promised myself I will not be a feral filth wizard in my new house. Without the threat of rent inspections, it is likely I will fall into very bad habits. So I am determined not to. I am going to have a routine, dammit! I will do the dishes every night and make my bed and put my laundry away and make my house a haven of calm pristine-ness. And, if that fails, I will just hide all my crap upstairs ha ha. Why do you think I wanted a two-storey? 🙂
Whatever your goals are, I hope you are achieving them at your own pace and with no pressure from anyone else. And if YOU want to “drift through life”, I am totally ok with that. You have my absolute blessing 🙂
OK, so I know Bucket Lists are pretty common these days. Everybody is writing them. Some people are even following through on their wishes. Not sure if I can do the same but I do know there are some things I would like to be able to do before I kick the proverbial. Many of them are very tame, in comparison to other people’s. But that’s ok I guess. Some of them are quite pedestrian. But you have to start somewhere I suppose, and one person’s dream is another’s reality. To me, owning a home is a big deal – it seems unattainable, and yet I know people who have bought and sold many houses. It’s all relative.
Actually, I think my bucket list needs some work. I think it is supposed to be more spectacular. I think I’m supposed to write things like “Climb a Mountain” or “Run a Marathon”. Most of the time I would be happy to just get out of bed on time and not bump in to things a lot. But, as I said, it’s all relative and personal.
So here goes, in no particular order (and I will no doubt add to this as the months go by and I think of extra stuff I should have included) :
- Write a book
- Sky Dive
- Travel to Iceland
- Love myself
- Read all the books in one of those “1001 Books You Must Read before You Die” lists, like THIS
- Learn to dance
- Dye my hair purple
- Learn to walk in heels without falling down
- Visit Stonehenge
- Buy a house
- Study something I am passionate about
- Find a job I enjoy, not just tolerate
- Volunteer at an animal shelter
- Stand up for myself when it really counts
- Learn to play guitar
- Cultivate a viable vegetable garden
- Swim with whales/whale sharks/sharks/manatees
- Get a tattoo (maybe…I keep changing my mind on this one)
- Learn glass blowing
- Sleep on the beach for at least one night, under the stars
- Go on a luxury cruise
- Write a love letter to everyone I know and care about, so they know how I feel about them before it is too late
- Perform a random act of kindness on a grand scale
- Have my own business – nothing crazy or huge, just something that is my own
- Fly in a hot air balloon
- Sing with other people (not just by myself, in the car)
- Meet Jamie Oliver
- Become a morning person (my 6 year old nephew literally leaps out of bed in the morning, beaming and laughing and singing. EVERY. MORNING. He is sunshine on a stick. I want to be like that).
- Be medication free
- Have dinner on a rooftop. I’m not going to push my luck by saying a romantic dinner. Any old dinner will do.
- Go on a proper road trip
- Learn to meditate
- Buy, and use, a hula hoop
- Do yoga regularly
- Be at peace with myself and my body
- Bake my own bread
- Stop being an insomniac
- Learn to make a “proper” curry, from scratch
- Learn to make kimchi
- Eat something wonderful and fattening in Paris
- Become vegan – or as close to it as I can
- Have coffee/tea with a stranger
- Go thrifting in New York
- Be part of a vintage pin-up photo-shoot
- Learn to drive a manual car
- Achieve 1000 followers on my blog
- Complete an art journal
- Learn to sew my own clothes
- Stop procrastinating
- Teach my craft
- Create a Youtube channel (which would require me to achieve points 33 & 49 simultaneously)
- Appear in one of my favourite magazines (for a good reason)
- Go a whole week without watching TV
- Read a book a week
- Make and enjoy a stack of pancakes, all by myself
- Grow my own herb garden
- Take an op-shopping tour of Australia
- Get a fringe
- Have a market stall
- Take a long, cross-country train ride
- Send a message in a bottle (haven’t worked out how to do that in an environmentally-friendly way, yet, but I am working on it)
- Create a shrine/altar in my home
- Be kissed by someone lovely when I’m not expecting it
That will do for today 🙂 How about you? Do you have a bucket list? Have you ticked anything off yet or added new things? Any items you’ve changed your mind about?
Have a great day everyone 🙂