Been a difficult week this one. Dealing with a lot of stuff. Which is like every other week, but some week’s stuff is worse than another week’s stuff, y’know? It’s heavier and darker and murkier and stronger. No real reason, it just IS.
I’ve been trying to get my butt out to walk, at least every other day. It does help. Not because YAY EXERCISE AND ENDORPHINS! but because it just gives me one less thing to dislike about myself and be dissatisfied about. I can tick the “get moving” box and scrub out the guilt-ridden one. I can feel like my blood is pumping and I’ve breathed in a little bit more air. It forces me to exhale (and, granted, wheeze and pant a little) and just be part of the world. Instead of hiding, which is what I would rather be doing, in all honesty.
I am so lucky to live near water – it is cleansing and soothing. It brings an inner peace, if only for a few moments and makes things a bit clearer.
I walk – not because I want to (not yet, not now) but because I know I need to.
I hope you are doing ok this week, wherever you are x