Update on the Girls

Update on the Girls

So it’s been a couple of months since I had my breast reduction and I figured I should give a quick update.  A purely text-based update.  No pictures.  Ew.  Actually, the scarring is so ridiculously minimal, you would hardly even know I had had anything done.  It really is amazing.  In such a short space of time.

I am able to wear a “normal” bra now, not just the surgical one 24-7.  I still alternate between the two though – I have gotten used to the surgical one and it’s pretty comfy.  I’m not allowed to wear underwire bras yet but next month I can transition to that if I feel comfortable doing so.  I am still supposed to be wearing the silicone patches at night to help with the scarring but I have been a bit slack with those.  They’re starting disintegrate a bit and so I haven’t been wearing them every night.  I don’t want to buy replacements – they’re very expensive, especially as they’re purely for cosmetic reasons.  If they were to stop infection or prevent my boob from falling off, then maybe I would get some more.  But if it’s just to help reduce a scar no one else is probably going to see, meh.  The majority of the scarring has gone or faded to almost nothing anyway.

I have to start getting back to proper exercise.  I used my boobs as an excuse for not exercising for so long, I can’t continue with that excuse any longer.  I’m allowed to exercise more vigorously now, as long as the “girls” are properly supported.  So will get on to that.  I would really like to go running but ever since the meningitis, my balance is so whack and I get vertigo if I move quickly.  More excuses 🙂

It’s been a bit of a process getting used to the new me.  I don’t regret the surgery at all. AT ALL.  But it is strange to be so much smaller.  I won’t say I feel less feminine – I don’t – and it’s not like I miss having big boobs – I really don’t – but sometimes it’s, I don’t know, weird, to be this size.  My clothes fit differently and I LOOK different, not just in that area but overall.  As predicted, I am now paranoid about the rest of my body.  I hate my lower half now with the same passion I hated my top half before.  Never satisfied.  But I will work on it.  I just want to be in proportion.

My neck and back have been SO much better.  The improvement was immediate.  Much of that is psychological, I’m sure, but who cares?  I know I am holding myself differently and not slouching so much.  I’m not “hiding” myself the way I did before.  And even with all the scarring and swelling and everything else, even straight after surgery they look 100% better than they did.  I am not complaining at all.  I just have to work on my attitude to myself and get my health and fitness levels up again so I don’t start thinking about having liposuction ha ha.

I do feel a bit more confident in my general self.  I guess I don’t feel like I am on show any more.  Maybe I was imagining it before.  Maybe no one ever noticed my boobs.  But I felt like they did and I hated it.  Now I’m just more normal looking.  To me anyway.  I feel smaller, in a good way.  Not sticking out like a sore thumb, so to speak.

I wish wish wish I had done this before.  I could have had avoided years of pain and anxiety.  I could have saved myself thousands of dollars in physio sessions and medications and pain killers and heat rubs and quack therapies.  I could have been less self-conscious for a whole extra decade or so.  But we live and learn.  I’m so glad I did it.  I’m glad I made the decision on my own and did it all on my own.  No one else to answer to.  I paid for it myself and I needed no one else’s permission or blessing.

I had a fabulous doctor.  I could not have asked for better.  He didn’t treat me like a piece of meat, but like a human being he wanted to help.  Do I think he is in it for the money?  No, I don’t.  But I think he was worth every penny.  And, in the end, it really wasn’t expensive, all things considered.  And what price can you put on happiness and health anyway?

So, all in all, would I do it again?  Yes.  Would I recommend it to someone else?  Yes, yes and yes.  Is there a period of adjustment afterwards?  Yes.  There have been days when I feel…not regret…but a feeling of, I don’t know…did I do the right thing?  The doubt only lasts two seconds and then I go back to being happy and knowing I did the right thing.  Being in less pain is amazing.  Feeling less self-conscious is awesome.  Being able to fit in clothes is great.

It’s all good.  The girls are ok 🙂

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Books, Bargains and Freo

Books, Bargains and Freo

Aghhghghhh!  A whole month has gone by and I have to go back to work tomorrow!  Ugh!  So unfair!  Why didn’t I win the lottery in that time?  Possibly because I didn’t buy a ticket, but hey, let’s not let reason and sense get in the way here!  I can’t believe four weeks has passed and I have little to show for it.  OK, so I have new-ish boobs (or, at least, smaller ones) which are healing nicely, thank you, but not much else has been accomplished.  To be fair, I wasn’t able to do much for the first couple of weeks, being sore and ouchy and so tired (I think my body just went “Ahhhhhhhhh” and wanted to recuperate and rest and sleep) but, really, I was hoping to get a few more things done.  To be honest, it was nice to be forced to relax and NOT do anything.  I actually read three whole books.  Woo!  I love reading but never take the time these days to actually curl up with a book and spend a hour or three lost in its pages.  I read “Sufficient Grace” by Amy Espeseth (oh so good – I couldn’t put it down), “The Invention of Wings” by Sue Monk Kidd (also excellent – my Mum read it straight after me and she loved it too), and “The End of the Alphabet” by C. S. Richardson (Oh, such a sad but beautiful book.  I finished it in a morning.   I made my Mum read this too and she also cried ha ha.  We are a pathetic pair).

These final few days, as I went into “Oh God I have to go back to work!” panic mode, I tried to pack as much entertainment and activity as possible, so as not to waste the time.  A couple of days were spent getting my house in order, doing mundane things like ironing, tidying up and sorting out paperwork (who am I kidding?  I just ended up watching thrifting haul videos on Youtube! There was no tidying or sorting!) and trying to get ready for the routine of the working week.

On Tuesday, I met my cousin for lunch and spent a nice afternoon with her, chatting and eating too much.  We dined at Yocal, one of my absolute fave places to eat.  Their menu is excellent – lots of vego and vegan choices, reasonably priced and the staff are super friendly.  It’s hip and cute and the food is DELICIOUS!  My cousin and I shared the Mushroom and Haloumi burger – so yummy!

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On Wednesday, after having my dressings removed and surgical wounds checked to make sure they were healing ok (they were, thankfully), I did a bit of op-shopping with Mum.  We visited 3 or 4 stores but neither of us had any luck in finding anything.

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We also went to a second-hand book store and found a few bargains there.  I got some nice decorating and craft books plus a handy guide to succulents.  I particularly liked the title of one of the books :

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Mum got some lovely gardening titles and a couple of novels.  We visited IKEA and had lunch before grabbing a few bits and pieces (can’t leave IKEA without getting SOMETHING) including some awesome journals with lovely blank pages, perfect for journaling or drawing or painting or whatever! (We just like notebooks – it’s a sickness).

On Thursday, Mum and I went down to the port town of Fremantle for the day.   Lots of lovely shops, markets and places to eat.  Our first stop was East West Design  – a treasure trove of furniture and home wares from every corner of the globe.

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We had not been before, but the owner is a friend of my cousin’s, so I had heard about it and was keen to have a look.  Oh Mylanta!  So many pretty things!  And it went for miles and miles!  The stock was floor to ceiling, pretty much, in a huge warehouse-size shop, with every taste catered for.  I spotted a cute little shelving unit, white and so pretty, as soon as I stepped in the door.  I really had to convince myself not to buy it, but in the end I knew I really had nowhere for it in my little house.  However, Mum did purchase a matching magazine rack that was really nice and will look great in her place.

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She also got a Buddha head – she’s been searching for one for ages.  It’s for her garden – this one was just the right size and colour and an amazingly inexpensive price.  Perfect.  The one pictured below was a very large version – nearly as tall as me and weighed a tonne (a bit like me ha ha).  It was $900…a bit out of our price range but I would love to have had it in MY garden!  Oh well, I know where to get one from if ever I come into money!

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Afterwards we pottered around Fremantle and had a look in some little shops, including the Oxfam store, which always has some lovely things.  Mum is currently redecorating her lounge room in blue and white so her eye was quickly drawn to the goodies on display here.  She ended up buying a little candle holder – so pretty and the blue is just right (you can see it in the photo below – second from the right, top right corner).

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Fremantle itself has some lovely street art, decorating even the most mundane of items, like rubbish bins and plant boxes.  Check out these gorgeous mosaic planters :

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I noticed that the majority of shops and cafes also had these recycled wood plant boxes – so rustic and chic! :

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 Even the boring old bollards on the corner of the street were jazzed up :

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We had a lovely day just walking around and window shopping, before heading home to beat the traffic.

Wish we could have more days like this – it’s so nice to just wander around, having nowhere you need to be and nothing urgent that needs doing.  If only pesky work didn’t get in the way all the time!

So it’s back to the grind for me tomorrow.  I am looking forward to seeing my workmates but not relishing the idea of getting up when it is cold and dark.  Ugh.  I should have been practicing my “getting up when the alarm goes off” routine but, alas, I have been sleeping in super late every day.  Oh well, I’m sure I’ll get used to the daily drudgery soon enough!

🙂

Cups

Cups

Now that I have smaller boobs
There’s one thing on my mind
To get some clothes that fit me well
(They’ve been previously hard to find)

I’m going to get me a turtle-neck
It’s the stuff of dreams come true
To be able to wear its tight-fitting style
For me is an amazing coup

I’m going to find some button-up tops
That actually BUTTON UP!
It’s such a revelation to me
To shop with smaller cups

I’m going to feel more confident
I’m going to be less shy
I’m going to enjoy the feeling
Of having people look me in the eye

My chest won’t be my shame now
It won’t even raise a glance
I’ll be walking around with no clothes on
Just give me half a chance!

I won’t have to worry ’bout jiggle
I won’t have to worry ’bout bounce
I won’t have to worry ’bout being covered up
I won’t have to worry an ounce

But now there’s the worry of my thighs
I think they’re a little too thick
And the sight of the stomach I now can see
Is making me feel a bit sick

I think I’ll focus on my top half
Pretend the bottom ain’t there
I’ll focus on sweaters and blouses and vests
(and make sure my legs are not bare)

I’ll no longer have an achey neck
My back will feel much better too
It’s such a relief to have less pain
I’ll be doing less whinging here too

So I’ll raid the shops for clothing
I’ve never been brave to wear
I’ll pick up low-cut t-shirts
Try them on without a care

Because now my boobs are smaller
Life has changed somewhat
I’ve always been grateful for life as it is
(but now I’m happy with what I’ve got)

Sorry, couldn’t help myself 🙂

Goodbye Girls

Goodbye Girls

Hello peeps!  I’m back!  Back in my own little house after my breast reduction surgery two weeks ago.  My Mum took very good care of me and now she is staying with me for a few days just to help me get settled and sorted (ie do some of the “heavier”  housework for me because I still have to be careful, physically).  So, how was the surgery?  Honestly, I can say it was pretty non-eventful.  I went in one afternoon at noon, had the surgery at about 4:30 and was discharged the next morning at 9am.  No stress, no drama, not much pain and I’m now kicking myself that I didn’t do this a decade ago.

Seriously, I thought I would be in A LOT more pain.  I had steeled myself for excruciating agony but it was more like mild discomfort and a bit of stinging.  I didn’t even take the prescribed pain meds.  I just took regular paracetamol every few hours for the first week and then kept forgetting to even take that.  Now, I am told, I do have a very high pain threshold anyway but, honestly, it was no big deal.  Yes, it hurt, but not in some agonising, making-you-want-to-cry kind of way.  Actually, the second week was worse as I think all the nerve endings starting doing their thing and so it was tingly and raw, like being sunburned.  Also, I got a nice dose of PMS, so that always makes me swell up etc. This is way too much information for you…

There was no bleeding or oozing or horrible bruising.  After a few days I did come out in a rather fetching yellow discolouration (y’know how bruises go that weird yellowy colour?) but that was nothing exciting.  I slept well, after the first night or two when it was a bit difficult to get a good sleeping position, and really had no ill-effects at all.  Tiredness, I guess – but I suppose healing takes it out of you physically, plus getting over having an anaesthetic etc.

I have to wear a surgical bra for weeks.  All day, every day.  I have dressings that need changing every now and then but a nurse does that for me and Mum and I just add extra bits if needed (sometimes the edges curl up and you need to stick ’em back down with something!).  I’m glad Mum didn’t have to do anything too awful – she’s not good with blood and guts.  The only thing she really needed to do for me in that way was blow-dry my chest ha ha.  Yep, the dressings had to be dry before I got dressed after a shower, so I had to stand in the lounge room with Mum blow-drying my boobs!  The things we do…

So I am gingerly getting back to normal but not doing any heavy lifting or anything that requires me to stretch my arms out too far.  I am able to drive – thank the Gods! – so at least can get out of the house now.  I have a couple more weeks off work so hopefully the discomfort will improve gradually and I will be able to do more each day.  I have put on loads of weight, not doing anything and eating too much, but I am trying not to worry about that too much.  I will get back to exercising and eating better soon.

So that’s it.  Wish I had done it before and would recommend it to anyone considering it.  My surgeon was awesome and worth every penny.  The care I got at the hospital was wonderful and the aftercare has been great too.  I am looking forward to the final result once all the swelling has gone down.  I LOOK smaller – not just in that area but all over.  I feel better in myself.  I didn’t realise how much I hated my “girls” and how self-conscious I was, but even in terms of not having the weight of them pulling at my neck and back, things are so improved already.

Here’s to better things, smaller worries and a happier me.

x

Dawdling and Doodling…and boobs.

Dawdling and Doodling…and boobs.

Just a bit of doodling and painting (when I should be cleaning and ironing…).  I’ve had a rotten month of lurgies and injuries, stress and strife, so a weekend spent doing not much is in order.  I done my laundry and even cleared up the kitchen, which was in danger of collapsing under the weight of not-done washing up, and now I’m about to toddle off for a brisk walk in the remaining sunshine of the day.  A strained back and neck have meant I’m not up to much else, exercise-wise, and my poorly neglected garden will have to wait, yet again.

One thing I should mention is that I had a mammogram this week.  My first ever.  I approached it with some trepidation but decided that it could well be something that saves my life, so I should approach it with as much positivity as possible.  I have to say, if you’ve been putting it off, DO go and get it done.  It’s not as awful as you may think.  Sure, it’s uncomfortable and not the kind of thing you would choose to do for fun, but it is quick and easy and something you should make the time for.  I am younger than the usual “prescribed” age for a mammogram but as I am having some surgery later in the year, my surgeon wanted to make sure everything was hunky-dory in boob land.  And, thankfully, my results showed no nasties and I was given the all-clear to have surgery (more on that later).

As women, we tend to have to have no-very-pleasant health checks and I think many of us fear the mammogram unnecessarily.  But, honestly, I am not the bravest of individuals – if I can go and get one, so can you.  The entire procedure takes barely 15 minutes from start to finish and the actual time spent being “squished” is mere seconds.  If you get a nice technician (which I did, thank goodness!) the experience is made all the more pleasant, or at least bearable.

So, here endeth the public service announcement from moi.  Mammograms – not as scary as you might have been led to believe.  Less fun than a day at the beach, but infinitely more enjoyable than a maths exam or having a tooth extracted.  I am glad that I have had one now, because I will not dread it the next time and can put my friend’s minds at ease, should they be next to have one.  Just remember, it could save your life and a little bit of discomfort is definitely worth that.

Hope you are all having a lovely Saturday – I am off for my walk, taking my “girls” with me.

x

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