Update on the Girls

Update on the Girls

So it’s been a couple of months since I had my breast reduction and I figured I should give a quick update.  A purely text-based update.  No pictures.  Ew.  Actually, the scarring is so ridiculously minimal, you would hardly even know I had had anything done.  It really is amazing.  In such a short space of time.

I am able to wear a “normal” bra now, not just the surgical one 24-7.  I still alternate between the two though – I have gotten used to the surgical one and it’s pretty comfy.  I’m not allowed to wear underwire bras yet but next month I can transition to that if I feel comfortable doing so.  I am still supposed to be wearing the silicone patches at night to help with the scarring but I have been a bit slack with those.  They’re starting disintegrate a bit and so I haven’t been wearing them every night.  I don’t want to buy replacements – they’re very expensive, especially as they’re purely for cosmetic reasons.  If they were to stop infection or prevent my boob from falling off, then maybe I would get some more.  But if it’s just to help reduce a scar no one else is probably going to see, meh.  The majority of the scarring has gone or faded to almost nothing anyway.

I have to start getting back to proper exercise.  I used my boobs as an excuse for not exercising for so long, I can’t continue with that excuse any longer.  I’m allowed to exercise more vigorously now, as long as the “girls” are properly supported.  So will get on to that.  I would really like to go running but ever since the meningitis, my balance is so whack and I get vertigo if I move quickly.  More excuses 🙂

It’s been a bit of a process getting used to the new me.  I don’t regret the surgery at all. AT ALL.  But it is strange to be so much smaller.  I won’t say I feel less feminine – I don’t – and it’s not like I miss having big boobs – I really don’t – but sometimes it’s, I don’t know, weird, to be this size.  My clothes fit differently and I LOOK different, not just in that area but overall.  As predicted, I am now paranoid about the rest of my body.  I hate my lower half now with the same passion I hated my top half before.  Never satisfied.  But I will work on it.  I just want to be in proportion.

My neck and back have been SO much better.  The improvement was immediate.  Much of that is psychological, I’m sure, but who cares?  I know I am holding myself differently and not slouching so much.  I’m not “hiding” myself the way I did before.  And even with all the scarring and swelling and everything else, even straight after surgery they look 100% better than they did.  I am not complaining at all.  I just have to work on my attitude to myself and get my health and fitness levels up again so I don’t start thinking about having liposuction ha ha.

I do feel a bit more confident in my general self.  I guess I don’t feel like I am on show any more.  Maybe I was imagining it before.  Maybe no one ever noticed my boobs.  But I felt like they did and I hated it.  Now I’m just more normal looking.  To me anyway.  I feel smaller, in a good way.  Not sticking out like a sore thumb, so to speak.

I wish wish wish I had done this before.  I could have had avoided years of pain and anxiety.  I could have saved myself thousands of dollars in physio sessions and medications and pain killers and heat rubs and quack therapies.  I could have been less self-conscious for a whole extra decade or so.  But we live and learn.  I’m so glad I did it.  I’m glad I made the decision on my own and did it all on my own.  No one else to answer to.  I paid for it myself and I needed no one else’s permission or blessing.

I had a fabulous doctor.  I could not have asked for better.  He didn’t treat me like a piece of meat, but like a human being he wanted to help.  Do I think he is in it for the money?  No, I don’t.  But I think he was worth every penny.  And, in the end, it really wasn’t expensive, all things considered.  And what price can you put on happiness and health anyway?

So, all in all, would I do it again?  Yes.  Would I recommend it to someone else?  Yes, yes and yes.  Is there a period of adjustment afterwards?  Yes.  There have been days when I feel…not regret…but a feeling of, I don’t know…did I do the right thing?  The doubt only lasts two seconds and then I go back to being happy and knowing I did the right thing.  Being in less pain is amazing.  Feeling less self-conscious is awesome.  Being able to fit in clothes is great.

It’s all good.  The girls are ok 🙂

Cups

Cups

Now that I have smaller boobs
There’s one thing on my mind
To get some clothes that fit me well
(They’ve been previously hard to find)

I’m going to get me a turtle-neck
It’s the stuff of dreams come true
To be able to wear its tight-fitting style
For me is an amazing coup

I’m going to find some button-up tops
That actually BUTTON UP!
It’s such a revelation to me
To shop with smaller cups

I’m going to feel more confident
I’m going to be less shy
I’m going to enjoy the feeling
Of having people look me in the eye

My chest won’t be my shame now
It won’t even raise a glance
I’ll be walking around with no clothes on
Just give me half a chance!

I won’t have to worry ’bout jiggle
I won’t have to worry ’bout bounce
I won’t have to worry ’bout being covered up
I won’t have to worry an ounce

But now there’s the worry of my thighs
I think they’re a little too thick
And the sight of the stomach I now can see
Is making me feel a bit sick

I think I’ll focus on my top half
Pretend the bottom ain’t there
I’ll focus on sweaters and blouses and vests
(and make sure my legs are not bare)

I’ll no longer have an achey neck
My back will feel much better too
It’s such a relief to have less pain
I’ll be doing less whinging here too

So I’ll raid the shops for clothing
I’ve never been brave to wear
I’ll pick up low-cut t-shirts
Try them on without a care

Because now my boobs are smaller
Life has changed somewhat
I’ve always been grateful for life as it is
(but now I’m happy with what I’ve got)

Sorry, couldn’t help myself 🙂

Dawdling and Doodling…and boobs.

Dawdling and Doodling…and boobs.

Just a bit of doodling and painting (when I should be cleaning and ironing…).  I’ve had a rotten month of lurgies and injuries, stress and strife, so a weekend spent doing not much is in order.  I done my laundry and even cleared up the kitchen, which was in danger of collapsing under the weight of not-done washing up, and now I’m about to toddle off for a brisk walk in the remaining sunshine of the day.  A strained back and neck have meant I’m not up to much else, exercise-wise, and my poorly neglected garden will have to wait, yet again.

One thing I should mention is that I had a mammogram this week.  My first ever.  I approached it with some trepidation but decided that it could well be something that saves my life, so I should approach it with as much positivity as possible.  I have to say, if you’ve been putting it off, DO go and get it done.  It’s not as awful as you may think.  Sure, it’s uncomfortable and not the kind of thing you would choose to do for fun, but it is quick and easy and something you should make the time for.  I am younger than the usual “prescribed” age for a mammogram but as I am having some surgery later in the year, my surgeon wanted to make sure everything was hunky-dory in boob land.  And, thankfully, my results showed no nasties and I was given the all-clear to have surgery (more on that later).

As women, we tend to have to have no-very-pleasant health checks and I think many of us fear the mammogram unnecessarily.  But, honestly, I am not the bravest of individuals – if I can go and get one, so can you.  The entire procedure takes barely 15 minutes from start to finish and the actual time spent being “squished” is mere seconds.  If you get a nice technician (which I did, thank goodness!) the experience is made all the more pleasant, or at least bearable.

So, here endeth the public service announcement from moi.  Mammograms – not as scary as you might have been led to believe.  Less fun than a day at the beach, but infinitely more enjoyable than a maths exam or having a tooth extracted.  I am glad that I have had one now, because I will not dread it the next time and can put my friend’s minds at ease, should they be next to have one.  Just remember, it could save your life and a little bit of discomfort is definitely worth that.

Hope you are all having a lovely Saturday – I am off for my walk, taking my “girls” with me.

x

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Rose-tinted days (and the dentist)

Rose-tinted days (and the dentist)

I spent a lovely afternoon at a garden centre with my cousin, Aunt and Uncle last week.  I love my Aunt – she is so amazing and despite battling many illnesses (not least of which is chronic renal failure) she is always upbeat and cheerful.  She never lets anything get her down and she is so strong and tough.  She does her own dialysis at home (I could never be that brave!) and is just an inspiration. So it was lovely to get to spend some time with her and my Uncle.

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Despite the cold weather, it was a beautiful sunny day and we had a delightful morning tea, and enjoyed a nice leisurely stroll around the centre, looking at all the beautiful flowers that were in bloom.  Such gorgeous roses!  In every colour imaginable.  I wish I had a greener thumb and could keep beautiful plants like roses alive and well but, alas, I am a killer of all things green (except for a few herbs) and can only swoon and sigh at other people’s horticultural success.  Just look at these fabulous specimens, beginning with the “Abracadabra” rose:

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Unfortunately, that day I also had an appointment with my dentist.  I am not what you would call a “regular” at the dentist.  So much has happened in the last year or so that I have allowed my dental health to get overshadowed (i.e. ignored).  I enjoy a visit to dentist about as much as I enjoy doing my taxes.  Both things are painful, take too long and usually end up costing me money.  This trip was no different… I have been experiencing pain and locking in my jaw for a while now and it has been getting worse, to the point my left side of the jaw is a bit out of whack.  I grind my teeth a lot and I thought maybe that had something to do with it.  My dentist confirmed that the night-time clenching and grinding (that sounded far ruder than I meant it to!) has indeed made my jaw a bit off-kilter.  It’s also cracked one of my back teeth almost in half.  Dr W said “it’s like the Grand Canyon in there!”  which is not something you really want to hear in regard to your teeth.  He said it was amazing that it hadn’t actually fallen apart completely or caused me any pain.  Anyway, I am now getting a “splint” for my bite so that I can’t grind my teeth at night, and a lovely, blingy gold crown for the cracked tooth.  So gangsta, yo!  I had the choice of gold or ceramic, my Dr W said he recommended gold as it lasts forever and as it is at the back of my mouth it won’t really show.  All this for the princely sum of about three grand.  There goes my new couch I was going to buy this month.  Oh well…couches can wait.  I don’t want the tooth to crack entirely and fall out or get really infected or anything so I need the crown and, in order to prevent any more cracked teeth or jaw issues, I have to get the splint as well.  Apart from those two things, I am really lucky to have good teeth – no signs of decay or need for fillings.  I’d hate to have ongoing dental problems – it’s so horrible and expensive!

It’s a long weekend this week so tomorrow (Monday) is a day off!  Hooray!  I am going to try not to sleep in (did that yesterday – slept for 17 hours, which is awesome but also DISGUSTING!) as I want to get some things done around the house and find some time for crafting as well.  Hope your weekend is going well, and, if you do have to go to work tomorrow, I hope Friday comes around again super quickly!  I’ll leave you with a funny little note I saw at the garden centre this week :

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🙂